24th of June

It has been a good 18 days since I collected my pink IC and left the army, and within these 18 days there have been ups and downs. Once again I did a lot of self reflection and I was more aware of what was making me feel down. I would say the first thing was the very fact that I pushed away and hurt the people that really cared for me even when I wasn't being fair to them. My actions have hurt them to the point some of them stopped caring for me, and I really regret my actions to this very day. I used to think that I would be able to easily find people that truly care for me, but after everything that has happened, I realised I was wrong, 100% wrong in fact.

People that you know might not turn out what they really are, in which they would turn out likely to just be acquaintances or even worse, betrayers / backstabbers. On the other hand, I am thankful to those people still stood by my side even though I might have unknowingly hurt them. I will definitely watch my actions and the things I say as these 2 things tend to easily hurt people the most.

Okay enough for the negative part! Visited a Chinese physician to get my stomach and re-flux problems checked, and apparently it was caused by the over consumption of cold food and beverages. Therefore even since then I've cut down on cold drinks but as for desserts I still have em' every once in a while, I mean it is impossible to completely not eat dessert :D (like, bruh come on!). At the same time I've completely changed my workout style to fully calisthenic-style and no weights. The main reason is because my gym that I signed up last year is expiring soon and it has at least 80 dollars worth of deposit left, but I have to travel pretty far to reach that gym. Calisthenics? I can do them anyway and anywhere. As of now, I am on my journey to doing my very first muscle up :)

Been studying for Uni almost every single day, as I know it is going to OMG difficult since it's an honours course squeezed into 21 months. Therefore if I am able to pull through the 21 months, my life would be way better after that. Not a lot of revision done in a day, just a chapter and loads of questions plus online research. Research plays a very big part in finding solutions and exploring more about that topic. I met up with a professor recently and he told me that just plainly memorizing answer will only help me to PASS, but to SCORE and EXCEL I have to do additional research and theory proving. But well, till then I am not going to stop my revision and research and at the same time enjoy my very much well deserved civilian life :D

Alright, it's pretty late so I will be getting some sleep. Since I am no longer in the army, I do have more time alone therefore I promise to update this dead blog more often :)

Cheers:)

7th of April

FINALLY! I managed to watch Dawn of Justice, in addition the whole cinema was empty when I was watching it :D Looks like I finally managed to strike off something on my bucket list, plus I had a good McDonalds meal while watching so that made it ten times better :)

Right now it's comics reading season, been reading the second year of Injustice: Gods Among Us and also the Marvel / DC crossover comics and I have to say the crossover series is way way more darker than most of the DC comics with Doctor StrangeFate in my opinion is the most OP shit every, no kidding.

60 days to ORD and I couldn't have asked for a better life than right now. Just that some people that I'm working with right now are just not willing to accept what they have, they complain about details and even talk bad about seniors behind our backs. Kinda makes be really annoyed when that happens as we are trying our best to keep this place running with no issues and some just want to start an internal coup. Not sure what exactly he / they want as whatever he / they wanted we have given, the complains still surface from time to time when we least expect it.

Oh well, just going to continue doing what I need to do and erase my presence from that workplace when I complete my service.

4th of April

One whole week of sinful meals and snacks, and I felt the first-hand effects of it just yesterday night after dinner. Soooo after dinner I headed to macs with my parents and we shared 2 meals. After drinking the iced lemon tea all by myself, I suddenly felt ultimately sick to my stomach and at the same time there was a sharp pain on my chest area in which to be more specific, my heart area. So I had to walk slower and fortunately the bus took quite some time to arrive at the bus stop therefore I was able to sit down, catch my breath and relieve the imminent anxiety attack.

I was able to reach home without throwing up or passing out (yes, literally), sat down and slowly sipped a cup of water. I told myself that from that point onwards if I want to eat unhealthy food for more than 2 days a week, I will have to compensate by exercising and participate in more high intensity training sessions every week. Therefore this morning I headed out for a run with a few of my platoon mates at the running track. The sun was blazing hot so I had to struggle the 2.4km, we then headed back into the sheltered shed to carry on with some static exercises. I nailed the push ups by doing 60 in one minute, and adding on 3 sets of 20 push ups with 1 minute of rest time in between. I was glad I didn't lose my touch with my push ups as that is the few exercises that I made the most improvements in. Next was pull ups, I broke my record by doing 8 solid pull ups and words couldn't express how proud I was with myself, all the late night training sessions at home and the official training sessions in camp have really paid off.

Headed home for another 4km run after an evening gaming / study session and here I am right now cooling down after a warm bath.

Plans for this week? Watch the Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice movie on Thursday and brushing up on my math, hopefully I can complete my year one math and move forward to my second year math by the end of this week. Hopefully my procrastination doesn't kick in when I don't want it to, haha :D

Time for bed! Cheers everyone!

Justin

23rd of March

Whatssuppp!! I'm back here once again even though I know literally no one actually reads my blog, but still it is one place I can type out whatever that is going though my head. Sick for one entire god damn week, all started with that stupid ice cream that I ate that gave me food poisoning, then came the fever, flu and body ache. To make matters worse I fell sick during the COMEX IT show period, so I didn't managed to attend the fair but luckily an extremely kind friend of mine went for the show, got me some brochures and then even went to purchase the items that I needed. Kudos to him, and I wish him the best in life for his limitless kindness and help for that period of time. (BTW the monitor that he got for me, I love it so so much. 23 inch borderless monitor is one hell of a monitor that will really enhance my gaming experience to the next level).

I'm still sick, suddenly getting painful headaches all day long after lunch. So I decided to sleep it off after my morning shift but still ached like hell after I woke up so I'm really hoping it gets better or else I won't be able to attend training tomorrow :\ I'm actually wondering if it is the weather that is causing many people including me to actually fall sick, or it is due to the fact that I have not been drinking enough water and getting enough rest? Honestly I really don't know, in any case I'm not taking any chances, gotta go and pop one of the migraine tablets before I hit the bed later on.

ONE MORE DAY, JUST ONE MORE DAY. One more day to what you may ask? Yes, it is the release of the Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice movie. I've waited for this movie for half a freaking year and it is finally out tomorrow, YES TOMORROW. Unfortunately I'm not able to watch it because I will be in camp. Luckily a lovely lady and very close friend of mine invited me this coming Sunday to watch the movie with some other friends, therefore I'm extremely thankful for her invitation.

This movie will be the prequel to the 2017 Justice League movie, and words cannot describe how much I'm so hyped about this coming movie. Sadly the Martian Manhunter will not be in the Justice League movie therefore I'm a little disappointed as the Martian is my favourite superhero from DC comics. But well? I'll leave that for 2017, right now I'm so looking forward to seeing the Son of Krypton versus the Bat of Gotham, plus the Amazonian powerhouse Wonder Woman herself! On a side note Gal Gadot is sooooo attractive:) *insert eyes of love here*

Time to sleep, and time to get rid of that stupid headache.

5th of February

Well well well, what do you know? It's February and I've got less than 4 months to ORD, pretty fast eh? Last week I received my number 1 uniform from headquarters and it totally fits me perfectly, I was glad that I didn't need to try on for more than 2 times as I was drenched in sweat and I didn't want to contaminate the other clean uniforms with my sweat.

Got a few pieces of good news during this 2 weeks. Firstly I got marksman in my combat shoot and I almost got full marks for the combined effort stage, 29 / 30 to be exact :) Secondly, I am going to be promoted first class CPL by the end of this month, section commander told me the good news while I was half asleep in the resting area. So it's more money and self pride when I head on for the milestone parade in May, and not to forget a chance for another promotion during my reservist. The last piece of good news is my IPPT, even though I am only 1 point away from the coveted gold award, I came in 3rd place out of the 55 2.4 km runners during the test with my timing of less than 10 minutes and 20 seconds. This timing is the fastest I've ever got in my entire life, never ran that fast before and I felt I could run even faster. The best part is that I am about to reach my goal of running a 10 flat for my 2.4 km run, I am going to train even harder from now onwards to hit my goal and to show people that hard work is what gives you good results.

Saturday mount tomorrow and I'm looking forward to it as there is going to be a session of intensive workouts and a good steamboat dinner! Alright, time for bed and adios!

15th of January - New Year's Resolutions

It has 2 weeks into the new year, and so much has changed around me. Be it from my best buddies, my NS life and even down to the people that I care for. I read about the truth on the kind of life that I was living, and it hit me really hard. Why? Because firstly indeed what I read was the truth on the kind of life I was living and how badly I want it to change. However this word 'change', scares the crap out of me (yes, no kidding). It associates with the question 'What will happen?' 

For now I do have a few unfinished tasks that I started in 2015 and I want to achieve them in 2016.

1. IPPT Gold

This is a promise that I made to myself after my MPTS days. I was weak, stupid, blur, emotional, delusion-ed, rash, easily influenced and someone who gives up easily. I saw the faces when people achieved the much coveted gold award for IPPT, and from that moment on I wanted to get that award. I want to be fitter, I do not want to be called weak anymore, nor do I want to fall behind in terms of fitness. Lastly I want to have something that I can be proud for achieving.

2.  Making peace with my past and my mistakes

This will take a shit ton of effort, like really. I've never been able to let go of who I am in the past, which is why is it haunting me day after day, The mistakes that I made, the people that I've misunderstood or hurt with my words and actions still flow back into my head until I snap out of it. I chatted with one of the counselor commander and he told me that to let go of one's past, is to first forgive oneself because making peace with the mistakes one by one. 

3. The 'wait & listen' character attribute / attitude

I got inspired by a TV show that is a childhood show of mine. In it is a race of people has mastered this particular human attribute. They wait and observe how their opponent attacks before making a swift decision and then counter attacking. I feel that this also applies to the real world, Some people nowadays are too rash in terms of decision making and also action wise, I am no exception and it has cost me dearly. I do not want to succumb to making mistakes over and over again because of the fact that I'm too rash and hasty to get things done or to solve things.

These 3 are my few resolutions for the new year. I guess no one will probably read this post, but I guess it is 3 cheers to the new year, to better health and to my future. *clanging of wine glasses*

Justin